We left the story with the mayor feverishly studying on the problem of how to get the big heavy window raised up into its new home in the window frame. Next to the six foot sliding glass door that leads out to the stairs to the deck, this window would be a showcase. Rising from bed, the tenant would walk forward and look out this large bay window at the beautiful and restful sight of a small Bay and Oak forest to his or her left (preferably both, as a loving couple). Below them they would look down upon their own, very private deck, cozy sunny and warm; protected from the cool marine breezes that waft across our little homestead. (the ocean is about five miles to the right, often bringing us fog in the summer months). Beyond the deck, they would see our large organic fruit and vegetable garden with the local deer browsing contentedly, just outside the garden fence. The prospective tenants will be invited to partake of the fruits of the garden (as long as they don't eat the apple from the tree of knowledge of good and evil...). Hopefully they will want to join those of us who toil in the garden to bring forth this luscious and wholesome produce which give us such stunning cholesterol numbers...
So you see how important the successful instillation is to the overall feng shui of the cottage. Because of the size and weight of the window and the distance it has to travel, I formulated a plan. I would use a rope to make a sling with two loops. This sling would be looped under the window. To keep the two sling loops spread apart, I would attach bungee cords on each side to pull the loops apart. Hopefully, you'll understand when you see the diagram below. The other end of the rope would be attached to the hook of my come-along. The rope would be strung over the transom above the window opening. I would hammer up a temporary 2 X 6 between the wall and one of the interior posts to attach the come-along too. I would be on the other side of that board cranking on the come-along lever. As I cranked, the rope would become taut and the window would begin to slowly, carefully rise up until it was dangling opposite the window opening. My faithful helper, brother Timmy, would be down below, guiding the window and making sure that the sling loops stayed far enough apart so the window wouldn't slip out.
I went to bed that night with a smile on my face. I was sure I had licked the problem and I couldn't wait to put my plan into action on the morrow.
The next day dawned clear and bright; perfect. After a bracing breakfast of bacon, eggs, toast and coffee, (Timmy had his usual mush) we headed down to our half-built cottage. I explained the plan to Timmy. As the man below the window, resting in its rope sling with bungee cords, as it slowly levitated skyward, he was understandably dubious. "I dunno, Mickey." my brother fretted, "Are you sure this is gonna work? I mean, that sucker is really heavy. If it falls out of your rope and bungee cord sling its gonna be, like, a total catastrophe! Don't forget I'm standing underneath that thing." "Timmy, Timmy!" I replied, reassuringly, "You are my beloved brother, I would never concoct a hair brain window raising scheme if I wasn't absolutely sure that it would be a success. I couldn't afford to lose this window...or you!" Muttering darkly under his breath and shaking his head, he reluctantly followed me down to where the window leaned against the wall. It looked massive and weighty. You could almost see it mocking us puny amateur window installers daring us to heave its mighty bulk up into the air, brashly going against the basic tenants of gravity.
Undaunted by the taunting window and my doubting Thomas, (hey, now there's a phrase!) I was determined to show them both that my plan would win in the end. While my brother watched, I fashioned a double loop with the end of the rope. I put one loop around each end of the bottom of the window, then I slung the bungee cords around the sides of the window. The pull from the bungees spread the loops apart so they supported the bottom of the window with a nice wide base. I knew that when I started hauling in the cable from the come-along the loops would want to come back together. It was the job of the bungees to keep them apart. "OK, Timmy, the first part is done. Now I attach the rope, which is looped over the transom above the window frame, to the come-along, which I anchor to the temporary 2 X 6 and I start cranking. Let's do this thing!" I cried, and I gave my brother a hearty slap on the back as I left to take my station in this great window-raising endeavor. Timmy didn't say anything and I saw the apprehension in his face. The only way to remove that look on the face of my doubting Thomas was to raise that window!
I went up the outside stairs and assumed my position behind the come-along. I started slowly pulling on the lever. The cable became taught; the rope straightened out and the building let out the slightest groan as pressures came to bear. "The rope is really tight but the window's not moving!" yelled Timmy from below. "Yeah, it's OK. We just have to get all the stretch out of the rope. Once we do that it will start to move!" I yelled back. By now I had hauled in the full length of the come-along's cable and I had to tie off the rope while I played the cable out again and reattached it to the rope with a hastily tied square knot. I used a C-clamp to pinch off the rope so it wouldn't "back slide" while I reattached the come-along's cable. Are you with me so far? Just refer to the diagram. You'll see that since the distance the rope had to go was much longer than the come-along's cable, it would take a series of cable hauls to get the window in position. I would have to pinch the rope in position with the C-clamp, pay out the come-along's cable and reattach it to the rope for the next "yo-heave-ho" on the come-along's lever multiple times.
I undid the C-clamp and commenced cranking the lever again. The cable pulled in and the rope stretched and the window sat, implacably on the ground, nestled in its sling. "It's still not
moving!" my brother cried, his voice breaking, just a little. "Be of good faith and trust in the wise ways of your brother. I've gotten us this far haven't I?" I replied. Outside and below there was silence. The only way to allay my brother's fears was to keep cranking until that sucker started to rise. I cranked some more. Suddenly with a mighty lurch the rope moved towards me. "It's moving! It's rising up! Sweet Jesus, we have ascension!" my brother cried, joyfully from below. I could see that because of the various forces of nature that were in play here (friction and inertia), the raising of the window would not be a smooth affair but a series of fits and starts as the window lurched upward. "Have it your way" I muttered. "You want to lurch, fine. You're still getting hauled up to your new home." So we continued the drill. Crank, crank, crank; LURCH! Tie off the rope, reattach the cable, release the clamp and crank some more. "It's working. It's working!" my brother cried. There was a note of triumph and wonder in his voice. "I told you it would work. I just didn't anticipate the lurching" I yelled back.
This effort went on for several hours. As I cranked, I noticed that the 2 X 6 I had secured to anchor the come-along was bending inward with the weight of the glass. Great, another "force of nature" to deal with. Well, fans, the anchor board held. The wall we were pulling the rope up didn't cave in and eventually our great and heavy prize was dangling across from the framed window opening I had fashioned for it. "OK, Timmy!" I shouted, triumphantly. "We're in position. Now I need you to come up here with me for the finale." Timmy came up and I explained the final bit to fit the window into the window frame. We each took long screwdrivers and slid them under each end of the bottom of the window. Slowly we managed to walk the window into its frame. Hastily, I went down below, climbed up a ladder and quickly nailed the window, temporarily into place. "We got you now, you sucker! Welcome to your new home."
I untied the double sling loops and slid the rope out from under the window. With the full weight of the window on our screwdrivers, we slowly wiggled them out. Now the window was sitting on its wooden window frame. I drilled in a few screws to hold it in place. I squeezed silicone caulk all around the edges and I attached the quarter round casing snugly to the inside of the window. I did the same to the outside and our window instillation was done. Painting would come later. "Well Timmy what do you think?" I said, "We did it! Pretty much the way I planned it. I couldn't have done it without your window guidance and your wonderful support." "I'm amazed!" gushed my brother, "this pile of wood and windows we started with is really turning into a house!"
The view from the window. No neighbors in sight; just part of the garden. The flowers means I'm getting ready to show the cottage to prospective (female) renters.
Our hardest task had been successfully accomplished. I fervently hoped that from here on in, it would be all downhill. We'll see in the next chapter of: "Mickey and Timmy Build a House; The Continuing Saga."
Hope to see you then! Mickey da Mayor of Happy Acres
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